crocobaby:

Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?

elvexx:

its so surreal to me how people can like homestuck for more than a year

theamazingindi:

listen, i don’t know about you, but the only people I know who actually enjoy the smell of axe body spray are not women. it’s dudes. it’s all dudes. i have worn axe body spray and walked into a room and have been complimented by legions of dudes. axe body spray is an agent of the gay agenda to make men smell better for other men to unlock their latent homosexuality and there is no stopping them now, we’re in too deep and it’s far too late.

aquaquinn:

I was able to fit the whole thing into one gif! 

aquaquinn:

I was able to fit the whole thing into one gif! 

drcabl3:

jessicreep:

kittydoom:

A Multi-Function Clip That Hides a Toolbox In Your Hair

Um yes!

I still want to bulk buy these and adonize  batch pink.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

mstoph:

my milkshakes bring all the boys are the yard and they’re like “your friend is hot”

kennyvee:

kjuw89:

justplainsomething:

hermionegranger:

Real Time with Bill Maher: 6.6.14 — Anthony Weiner, Jim Geraghety, Nicolle Wallace

#FINALLYSOMEONESAYSIT

Holy shit, Anthony Weiner actually said something important.

It’s a miracle!

That’s been the Republican strategy since day one of Obama’s presidency. Block the President at every turn, then blame him for not getting anything done. In fact, here’s Newt Gingrich openly admitting to it.

That’s why Republicans block jobs bills — so they can blame Obama for the economy still sucking. They’ve blocked budgets, resulting in a government shutdown that they then tried to blame on Obama. They’ve tried over and over again to block Obamacare, and complain that it’s a failure as they work their asses off to try to make it fail.

It’s kindergarten politics, and we need to vote these schmucks out in November. A bunch of white guys throwing temper tantrums and shouting NO! to everything just because they don’t like the president is no way to run a government, especially if we’re going to continue to pretend to be one of the greatest nations on earth.

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